Exiting grief

 It felt like I had sat in a car at 400km/h and hit a coconut tree, everything was obliterated and I walked out with just a sprained ankle. We mourned the passing of a family member and at the height of this emotional roller coaster, I went through denial, anguish, despair, a huge sense of loss, regret, and self-pity. I took it rather hard because I spent a great deal of time with my dogs. This is apparent when I am no longer in employment. There were long hours with the dogs as my companion. So, having said that, the bond is very close. Kitto's passing was sudden and nobody saw that coming. So, as a cautionary tale, if you have a female dog, and do not have plans to get a litter, please spay her. She will enjoy a longer life. 

Now the dust has settled, it's time to set new priorities. I have Bandit, the last of our pack, and it is my responsibility to take good care of him as I had with Kitto. The whole experience taught me something: Life is short.

I have to make use of time in a good and organized way. I took it back to the range to work on my archery form, which totally sucked in a big way. There is a tournament this weekend and this is a good way to focus on positivity and get into the game mindset. We have a bigger game down South at the end of the month and we need our minds to be on the game. I kept myself busy by building new competition arrows for Michelle. As for Bandit, we do full loops on our daily walks to get our hearts pumping and blood flowing. Time to move on and get back to where we were...

Rock bottom

 IT'S been 24 hours since we lost Kitto, our seven-year-old female Siberian Husky. Her sudden departure has left a big hole in our lives. 

I've experienced losing a family member, and close friends, but nothing has ever prepared me for the sudden demise of a pet dog, one which is very close to the family and a constant companion. I'm so used to having a pair of dogs waiting for me at the gate, now it's only one and the loss of his companion is slowly sinking in.
"Kitto's gone, boy...", I said to Bandit. He gazes into the distance, perhaps waiting for Kitto to come back home. The harsh reality is that things are no longer the same.

For me, it was rock bottom. I cleared off some of Kitto's belongings. Her crate was moved to storage. Some of her items were set aside. The lair that she used to sleep in is now vacant. It's hard to get the images out of my mind. What made me feel even sad is the fact that Kitto is still young. Her rapidly deteriorating health and death were sudden. I was looking forward to at least 10 - 12 years of having this pack together. This was my experience with my first pack of Siberian Huskies. Both lived to 12 and 13 respectively. At that age, every day, week, and month is an added bonus and when it comes to death at old age, it was acceptable. Kitto was around 7 years of age and I felt she was gone way too soon. With that in mind, I sank into further despair. I had Michelle, my wife to talk about this, something to air off my chest. Given the best of what we can to Kitto, I have come to terms that she was gone. Her mild temperament and constant companionship are irreplaceable. It will take time to suck it all up and move on...

I will utilize my time with Bandit to fulfilling my responsibilities, take good care of him, and include him in my outdoor pursuit. The older pack was lucky enough to go on hikes and a trip to the beach. And this is something that I owe my boy. Together, we will overcome our loss and heal the wound.

Remembering Kitto

 Kitto came into our lives four years ago when we fostered two rescued Siberian Huskies. 
She was a pure white, which is a rare marking for the breed and I immediately fell in love with her mild temperament. After a month of house-breaking, the fostered dogs are as good as our family members.

Last Friday, I noticed that she was not eating and was rather weak from malnutrition. I took her to the vet and have her examined. She checked out alright and was given medication for her lack of appetite. But in the following 48 hours, her health had taken a turn for the worse. Kitto was whining in pain. We had to endure the long holiday weekend and as soon as I can get a vet appointment, I scheduled her for a follow-up. This time, the vet diagnosed pyometra, an infection of her reproduction organs. She picked this up during her last heat and her uterus was inflamed. The swelling caused massive discomfort in her stomach, hence the lack of appetite. We did whatever we can to give her comfort.

After two consecutive blood tests, her odds are not in favour of recovery with an aggressive surgery to remove the infected organs. Nevertheless, I made the call. It's giving her a fighting chance rather than putting her to sleep. We don't give up at all. But fate has put it in a way, Kitto had a short life. I received a phone call while walking Bandit, our Sibe, and was told of her passing. My immediate thought was to give her a burial next to Sir Naughty and Dame Queenie, our previous pack.

Kitto's passing has left a massive void in our lives. I felt sad that her life was cut short due to an illness we didn't see coming. In her existence, she had given love without bounds. Kitto was always there waiting for us to come home. I spent a lot of time with her, taking both dogs for their walks. In the four years that we had Kitto, we gave her care and love she had never received as a pup. It's heartbreaking to see a beloved pet's rapidly declining health and we did everything we could to alleviate the suffering and pain. Kitto will always be remembered as one of our favourite pooch along with Sir Naughty and Dame Queenie.

Now that we are left with Bandit, my duty is to dedicate my time and love to him, as we still have years ahead of us. So, Kitto, say hello to Naughty and Queenie in Doggahalla. We will see you soon.