"The bike to end all bikes..."

In the beginning... 
A folding bicycle God told his prophet that there is a "bike to end all bikes..."
This left me with a burning desire to search for an answer.
Would take everything a God tells you as the gospel truth?
Well, cycling Gods that is.
For us mere minions, the wisdoms and teachings of those who are way ahead of us became a guide to doing things.
A 'bike to end all bikes?'
Is there such a thing? 


And the quest begins...
So, I asked the prophet: "And which bike this may be?"
"Its a Birdy..."

 
 Its been tested and proven.
But having heard one of the commandments, I've got to say this: "Dear Folding Bike God, you need to clean your glasses..."
Will a folding bike with a piece of elastic rubber and a ball-point pen spring as its full-suspension become a "bike to end all bikes?" 
That is good Soviet propaganda, but in reality, let's examine two things:


Case study number one
The Birdy has an "elastomer rear-suspension". 
What does this mean?
Well, let's put it this way, its a piece of elastic synthetic rubber, with a set tolerance to dampen the harsh rides on the road.
You can exchange the elastomer with a selection of different dampers of variable hardness.
Its not a 'suspension', but a damper.


Case study number two
There is a front coil spring, similar to what you see in ballpens with retractable heads.
Its a piece of spring allright, but would you qualify it as a 'suspension'?
The spring is located on a latch for you to fold the bike. 
And on bumpy roads, this 'bike will end your life'.


Word usage
I think the Folding Bike God did not pick his words wisely.
If he had said: "Its the bike to end your sore rides...", that would be appropriate.
For the record, you cannot adjust the 'suspension' on a Birdy to accustom your body weight.
There is no way to set a sag limit.


Conclusion
The Birdy is a fun bike. Its also overpriced. And its not the bike to end all bikes. Sorry, nice try, better luck next bike!